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Y Friday, November 30, 2007
Difference Between Women And Men
however if you think there is any similarity then you are neither
1.NAMES If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara.If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.
2.EATING OUT When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw in a $20 even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
3.MONEY A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need, but it's on sale.
4.BATHROOMS A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott.The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.
5.ARGUMENTS A woman has the last word in any argument.Anything a man says after that.. is the beginning of a new argument.
6.CATS Women love cats.Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.
7.FUTURE A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
8.SUCCESS A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
9.MARRIAGE A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change , and she does.
10.DRESSING UP A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.
11.NATURAL Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
12.OFFSPRING Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
13.THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Any married man should forget his mistakes.There's no use in two people remembering the same thing.
AND FINALLY.... A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position.As they passed a barnyard of mules, jack asses, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?""Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."
BLACK AND WHITE -
Friday, November 30, 2007
Y Sunday, November 04, 2007
BE AWARE FRIENDS , The world is getting sicker and a more unsafe place! Don't know how accurate these stories are, but better to be aware than be ignorant. ==========================================
This is a true story, it has been confirmed, and the Medical Centre phone number at the end of this story is real. This guy went out on a Saturday night a few weeks ago to a party. He was having a good time and had a couple of beers and some girl seemed to like him & invited him to go to another party. He quickly agreed & decided to go along with her. She took him to a party in some apartment and they continued to drink & even got involved with some drug (unknown). The next thing he knew, he woke up completely naked in a bathtub filled with ice. He looked down at his chest, which had "CALL 000 or YOU'LL DIE" written on it with lipstick. He saw a phone was on a stand next to the tub so he picked it up & dialled. He explained to the EMS operator what the situation was & that he didn't know where he was, what he took, or why he was really calling. She advised him to get out of the tub. He did, and he appeared normal, so she told him to check his back. He did, and found two 9 inch slits on his lower back. She told him to get back into the tub immediately, and they sent a rescue team over. Apparently, after being examined, he found out more - His kidneys were stolen. They were worth $10,000 each on the black market. He is currently in the hospital on a life support, awaiting a spare kidney. I wish to warn you about a new crime ring that is targeting business travellers. This ring is well organized and well funded, has very skilled personnel & is currently operating in most major cities around the world and recently very active in Sydney . The crime begins when a business traveller goes to a lounge for a drink at the end of the work day. A person in the bar walks up as they sit alone and offers to buy them a drink. The last thing the traveller remembers until they wake up in a hotel room bathtub, their body submerged to their neck in ice, is sipping that drink. There is a note taped to the wall instructing them not to move and to call 000. A phone is on the small table next to the bathtub for them to call. The business traveller calls 000 who have been quite familiar with this crime. The business traveller is instructed by the 000 operator to very slowly and carefully reach behind them and feel there is a tube protruding from the back. The business traveller finds the tube and answers "YES". The 000 operator tells them to remain still, having already sent paramedics to help. The Operator knows that both of the traveller's kidneys had been harvested. This is not a scam or out of science fiction novel. It is real. It is documented and confirmable. If you travel or someone close to you travels, please be careful. Sadly, this is very true.
I REALLY WANT AS MANY PEOPLE TO SEE THIS AS POSSIBLE SO PLEASE BOUNCE THIS TO WHOEVER YOU CAN.
Michele ShaferML/Lab AdministrationMedical Manager Research & Development99 Missenden RD , Camperdown, Sydney 2000Tel:(029)5156111;Fax:(029)4621505
I was approached yesterday afternoon around 3.30 pm in the Car parking lot by two males, asking what kind of perfume I was wearing. Then they asked if I'd like to sample some fabulous Scent they were willing to sell me at a very reasonable rate. I probably would have agreed had I not received an email some weeks ago, warning of this scam. The men continued to stand between parked cars, I guess to wait for someone else to hit on. I stopped a lady going towards them, I pointed at them and told her about how I was sent an email at Work about someone walking up to you at the malls, in parking lots, asking you to sniff perfume that they are selling at a cheap price. THIS IS NOT PERFUME - IT IS ETHER! When you sniff it, you'll pass out and they'll take your wallet, your valuables, and heaven knows what else. If it were not for this email, I probably would have sniffed the "perfume", but thanks to the generosity of an emailing friend, I was spared whatever might have happened to me, and wanted to do the same for you.
LET EVERYONE KNOW ABOUT THIS!
BLACK AND WHITE -
Sunday, November 04, 2007
Y
In war soldiers get injured, right? Here's howdifferent races exclaim: When the BRITISH got shot - OH MY GOD.....!!!! When the MALAY got shot - YA ALLAH....!!! When the INDIAN got shot - AH-YOYO AMMAH...!!! But when the CHINESE Hokkien got shot,they go - NABUEH CHEE BYE, TIOK LIAO...!!!!**************************
Signal for sex: Man marries deaf girl. He mimes to her: "Let's make a signal code if we want sex?" She nods and agrees. So he goes:"If I want Sex, I'll squeeze your breast. In response you can shake my penis once for"yes" and 50 times for "no"....***************************
Smart Thambi Thambi ask hooker how much for sex? She says:$50 on bed, $20 on sofa and $10 on grass. He then hands her $50. She says:"You man of class, one time on bed...?" He says: "NO!! 5 times on grass...." **************************
Comfort in Friendship: "Friends" are like underwear; always a comfort... "Good friends" are like condoms; always protecting... "Great friends" are like Viagra; lift you up when you're down ...*************************
New drink from Malaysia: The Malaysian government has approved therelease of a new drink made with cutting edgetechnology. It's a combination of Horlicks, Milo Kopi & Teh. It's called - "LICKMYKOTEH"....***************************
Positive thinking Positive thinking is like this.... A little bird flies up in the sky;you look up and it shits in your eye... But you don't mind and you don't cry... You just thank God that cows don't fly. ....
BLACK AND WHITE -
Sunday, November 04, 2007
Y
This is a true story of a young college girl who passed away last month, at Shah Alam. Her name is Priya; she was hit by a lorry. I don't want to mention the name of the college. She had a boyfriend names Shankar. He lives in Johore. Both of them are true lovers. They are always on the phone with each other. You can never see her without her handphone. She spends ¾ of the day talking with Shankar. Priya's family knows about their relationship. Shankar is very close with Priya's family (just imagine their love). Before she passed away she always told her friends "If I pass away please burn me with my handphone". She also said the same thing to her parents. After her death, people couldn't carry her coffin. I was there ~ a lot of them tried to do so but still couldn't , everybody including me, had tried to carry the coffin, the result was still the same. Eventually, they called their neighbour, a "bomoh" from Thailand (pak Darin), who is a friend of her father's. He took a seat and started speaking to himself slowly. After a few minutes, he said "this girl misses something here". Then her friends told Darin bout her intentions to burn her with her phone. He then opened the coffin and place her phone, together with the SIM card inside the casket. After that they tried to carry the coffin. It could now be moved and they carried it into the van easily. All of us were shocked. (can you feel the fear? I'm shaking at this moment.) Priya's parents didn't inform Shankar that Priya had passed away (pity Shankar). After 2 weeks Shankar called Priya's mom. Shankar: "Atte, I'm coming home today. Please cook something nice for me. Don't tell Priya that I'm coming home today; I want to surprise her." Her mother replied, "You come home first, I want to tell you something very important." After he arrived at Shah Alam, they told him the truth about Priya. Shankar thought that they were fooling around. He was laughing and said, "Don't try to fool me ... tell Priya to come out ... I have a gift for her. Please stop this nonsense." Then they show him the Priya's death certificate; they gave him proof to make him believe. Shankar started to sweat profusely. He said, "It's not true. We spoke yesterday. She still calls me." Shankar was shaking so badly when suddenly, his phone rang. "See this is from Priya. See this ...." he showed the phone to Priya's family. All of them told him to answer. He used the loudspeaker mode. All of them heard this conversation, loud and clear. No cross lines, no humming. It was Priya's voice! And there was no way others could use her SIM card as it was nailed inside the coffin! They were so shocked and asked for pak Darin's help. Pak Darin brought his master (Tok Chen) to solve this matter. He and pak Darin worked for 5 hours ... then they discovered one thing .....
*DiGi. Best coverage ever, ONE LOW FLAT RATE~!!!!!!! Anyone, any network, anytime, ANYWHERE!!!* I WILL FOLLOW YOU... FOLLOW YOU WHEREVER YOU MAY GO... Ok, now back to work ..... \(^*^)/ moron, best digi ad ever....
